Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
