Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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