I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
