Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Boobs speak an international language.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
