You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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