I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
