I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
