I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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