found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
