The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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