She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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