is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
