I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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