need another drink. this is the easiest way
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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