I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize