Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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