"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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