It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
