never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
