Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
