he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize