Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Randomize
