oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
