matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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