During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize