Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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