maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
