I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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