is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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