He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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