Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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