The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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