he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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