So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize