only if we run a train.
done.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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