My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
you will always have a special place in my vag
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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