I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
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