The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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