Cold hands, warm shart.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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