So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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