Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
This is my gift to your gina
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
