Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
