awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
