either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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