belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
