If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
