i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
