Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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