I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Randomize