It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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