My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
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