At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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